WEBSITE

why would you use your own name as an "artist name" with an 82 at the end?
because you can't get any more real than that. plus everyone should know their clock is ticking! (the numbers). I'm also a firm believer in taking what you've been given in life and running with it. I have a better question... why are ppl obsessed with creating an "image" of themselves with photos, names, & styles? fuck that, I gotta be real. so my "image" is nothing but me. I'm not trying to fool anyone, and in that way, I'm totally free to do whatever I want without anyone thinking "hey wait a minute". bottom line is, most ppl are only made up of layers of bullshit. I can smell it a mile away.

what's the deal with the green pitch fork symbol around your site? is it satanic?
sure! no. its a military symbol that stands for power, control, and being prepared by example. each of the forks represents time. past, present, & future. the shield and the "present" fork in the middle being the highest point, is what stands for power. there is also a much deeper meaning that I will not go into, but you will surely learn it someday on your own.

I keep seeing pictures & fan art of you in a paint mask and joker hat. what's the deal?
it's symbolic. the paint mask represents the environment I was raised in. colorful, strange, dangerous, & toxic. the hat represents my ability to keep a sense of humor through even the worst of situations. put me in the middle of a battlefield and I'll come out dragging bodies behind me handing out souvenirs. you'll never keep me down.

there was another artist on the internet who had a paint mask and joker hat too. who copied who?
yeah I saw that briefly before it disappeared a couple years ago. I got pictures of me wearing that shit from 1996 though. way before that kids' balls ever dropped, so whatever. fuck him, I guess.

how does the rating system work on your music page? (the little green faces to the right of each track)
it adjusts quarterly by the percentage of downloads it receives. so if it has a low rating it just means it hasn't been downloaded as much as the other tracks. or it sucks ass, 1 of the 2.

do you ever promote your site?
the only ppl I want knowing about me are ppl who have discovered me for themselves.

your website is all about you! are you obsessed with yourself?
holy fuck what a stupid ass question! you should be a journalist! let me put it like this.. I'm 100% convinced that if you had anything to show for yourself, you'd have a website too. but you don't, because you're a worthless shit-drone going about your pointless life asking creative ppl very uncreative questions because ultimately, you were created as food for monsters like me. I will bite your fucking head off you little bitch!

GENERAL

does your twisted sense of humor ever get you in trouble with ppl you just meet?
no, not at all. I always know when a joke is appropriate and when it's not. I'm a very well rounded, calm, and collective guy if you care to know me. I'm very well mannered, polite, and can talk to anyone instantly about anything. I'm not some freak in a cage. just a freak in the bed all up on your dirty ass wife.

I saw the [mblah] project you did for [soNso], where can I find more?
websites, recording sessions, photo shoots, music videos, album art, etc etc... those are all private contracts between me and whoever I'm doing it for. it's up to them on what they do with it all, not me.

I think you're funny and cool but ppl tell me you're violent and crazy. which is the real you?
they both are the real me. like everyone, it's dependant on our interactions. if you're cool, I'm generous, calm, easy going, and I'm cool with you too. if you're cocky, threatening in any way, or throwing hidden insults to me, you're going to hate me. I know there have been times where I've come off completely insane for no apparent reason, but what you didn't see, is the switch that was pulled before hand. all the shit that drove me to act that crazy. I swear, it takes a lot to piss me off. I always give ppl more than enough chance to correct themselves. I'm a calm dude, but I won't let you walk around on me. I'm not a loose cannon, but when I'm pissed, I'm really pissed. I won't waste my time trying to fight you either, I'll skip straight to trying to kill you. I don't care about the kung fu you think you know from watching MMgAy fights.. you can't even think like I do, let alone do something about it. but yeah, 95% of the time, I'm a really cool guy. unless you're purposely trying to piss me off, it's all good. I'm fun as hell to be around.

who installed the PA system in your car? why? how can I get 1 in mine?
I did, and because I like to make ppl laugh as I'm passing by. I've built and installed many PA systems since mine. if you want you can hit me up and I'll see what I can do for you.

I pulled up your arrest record through a cop friend of mine.. what's with all the [mblah]?
I'm not a time traveler, so I can't fix the stupid things I did when I was younger. all I can say is, I'm extremely sharp and aware of my surroundings at all times. over the years there's been a few ppl who've clearly never dealt with someone who carries out their warnings. ppl who think for some reason I'm average joe sausage head. it's like when it's too late to knock it off, they realize this, panic, shit on themselves, then call the cops like THEY'RE the victim. please, don't do that. you don't bother me and I won't bother you. nobody asked you to test me you ass. PS: your friend can suck a donut off the head of my junk.

I've seen graffiti on the sides of trains and in abandoned warehouses with your initials on it. did you do those?
I used to do a lot of that when I was younger, yeah. most likely. I tagged scientific equations, war quotes, aliens, skulls with giant dicks, all kinds of shit. not many of em were great, but they always had a meaning.

RUMORS

did you used to play Tony Hawk Underground online? and make videos with the name BioHaggard or KingTwisted?
NO. that kid was impersonating me for a good 2 years. his site (which was taken down), and that game, are pieces of shit. lol, I don't play sports video games. watching sports, and playing sports games, is GAY as hell to me. I'll stick to playing sports for real. why the fuck would I want to play them with my hands and eye balls?! fuck that game, and fuck that kid pretending to be me. he needs a girlfriend and he's fat. and if he would have asked to use my music in his videos, I would have said "yeah man, let me know how it turns out" with no questions! him acting like he was some all-powerful untouchable king-of-nerds is what made me slap him off his throne.

did you lose a fight with some stoner named Josh in Pasadena? (2000)
from what I remember, no. I head butted him twice, choked him, busted his ribs, and punched him in his neck. he slapped his hands around and curled into a ball on the ground. honestly, I was confused. it felt like a prank. so I stood up and he jumps on me, pins me, and starts talking like he's kicking my ass! I reversed it and started choking his ass out, but, he wasn't struggling to get up. I can't remember it clearly because of my head butts on what he was saying, but I let go. and wow, he started up again! this time someone broke it up and ended the shit, it was crazy. on the way home, ppl told me how he "snorted a ton of pain killers" cause he heard I was coming. but in the end, how many hits did I receive? zero. he even missed on a sucker punch that blew past my chin! if I had to name the biggest loser I've ever met at that point in time, he'd have been victorious by a mile. other than that, I didn't even consider it a fight. more like a dopey ass lunatic trying to gay me to death.

there are pictures of you in a dress that some girls took? (2002)
yes lol. someone send me those they were freaky! balls hanging out and shit.

this girl Jill says [mblah], is that true?
no. basically I was sucked into a crazy situation while dealing with my own. it severely clouded my judgment (as it wasn't my main focus at the time). I stepped into the crossfire of  lies, and became unknowingly a "lie carrier" back and forth. in any case, no matter what you've heard, I myself never did anything anyone (who knew the truth) could consider wrong. 1 thing I'm not, is a liar. to a flaw, I'm horribly and stubbornly honest, no matter how bad it makes me look. why? because lies never add up, and the truth eventually does.

did you try to stab [soNso] in the neck with a screwdriver after a party? (2007)
yes I did. hey big mouth.. don't ever try to follow me. especially to the middle of nowhere. you're lucky that car stopped to be nosey, or you'd have more than a hard time breathing. and for the record, you're 1 of the most shittiest ppl I've ever met. screaming & crying like a little bitch. always remember that however big your mouth is.. my trunk is bigger.

you & adrian aren't friends anymore because of a label dispute?
false. to be honest, no one knows why he left Ryan's record label OR stopped talking to us. 1 day - poof. he deleted everyone off his friends list on every social networking site, stopped all communication, with no explanation, wouldn't answer our calls, nothing. from what Ryan's told me, it seems like he fabricated some argument as an excuse to leave the label? I don't know, but that's a pretty wack tactic, and after trying to contact him (and josh) asking what was going on and not getting a response... I don't give a fuck. all those years I spent coaching him, setting him up with a home studio, computer (all for free), us being brothers, lending him money, and he throws it away cause he thinks it'll get him a better deal? that just tells me he's a snake in the grass and doesn't give a fuck who he has to use or manipulate to get fed. fuck him and whoever's dumb enough to help his ass. adrian, you'll never make it anywhere just by the back-stabbing manipulative personality you have alone. then you get Chris to hack my site with gay porn. haha, man we try to be the adults and let it go, but all you all do is bounce back like you got ppl scared and shit, when you're all just a bunch of pointless sniveling little assholes. seriously, make enough money to be happy with yourselves so I don't have to be 1 of the many ppl you think you gotta prove yourself to. we're all really, really tired of it.

did you get fired after 6 years at GGA because you threatened to report them to BBB?
I never reported them and no, I quit because the money I was making from home outweighed the money I made there. plus I was tired of all the dirty ass bullshit going on. the job was great up until the last year, when Dan Simpson took over. who is obviously a fucking retard not capable of making a sandwich on his own let alone run an entire company of men with zero tolerance for fuck-ups. his blinding cluelessness is totally killing everyone there on a daily basis. Dan Simpson + GGA = 10 pounds of shit in a 5 pound bag! give me a call when stop sucking your accountant's cock looking for answers on how to run a business you decaying pile of oozing dog anus. I needed your money like you need another 20 pounds, but I stayed there because I met a lot of cool ppl. there's no doubt you're a pile of shit, even you know that, but what you don't know (besides how to run a company) is the guys down in MD absolutely OWN your fat ass. without them, you'd just be "Dan Simpson the failure" instead of "Dan Simpson the failure MD changes diapers for". Anyway, fuck you, I need some cereal.

note: if there are rumors not listed here that you've heard, its because I haven't heard them yet myself. in which case, they're probably 100% shit.

MUSIC

I think I've heard you way back in the 90s. Is that possible?
yeah, I used to make instrumentals (no vocals). I did strange dance and wicked evil shit. I put em on tapes and sold em in school.  it was pretty common for me to be out somewhere and hear a car going by jammin my beats. the problem with that was, nobody knew it was me after awhile. I had no copyright on the tapes, or any vocals for ppl to recognize who it was. only thing I had was a "Danny Houser" sticker. and because of that, ppl began to spread the tapes on their own, not knowing who made it. word of mouth doesn't work well when other ppl try to take credit for it either. so yeah, that era of me taking over pplz tape decks was almost a waste besides meeting new ppl. my friends remember the beats at my house though when I was making them. and I still have the masters, so whatever. I'll update em and make a couple albums out of em later.

I heard that [soNso] wanted to meet with you and possibly suck on your penis and or [mblah].
look I hear this all the time. these ppl need to contact me personally. I can't pay attention to every stoner talking about how he's going to take over the world. if you're for real, great! but you gotta contact me. don't tell me stories about who you met either, I have no interest. I'm not the average "star struck" groupie that everyone else is. if you're all emotional about it like "music is my life" get a grip before contacting me. I mean, how sad is your life?! unless it supports your entire financial responsibilities, how is it your life? to me, my LIFE is my life. music is just the occasional soundtrack.

why is [soNso] the only 1 you've [mblah] for? what's so special about [soNso]?
I do certain things for ppl who do certain things for me. I don't wanna be associated with too many ppl publicly. especially since for the most part, ppl act like fuckin babies and get upset knowing I'm working with someone they got a problem with, and I don't feel like hearing it. I'm not in it for the "who did this, I heard this" shit, ok? yabba-dabba-doo! I'm not in it for that. if anything I'm in it for the connections. anything else might as well be printed on toilet paper so I can wipe my fuckin ass with it and slap to your forehead.

do you consider yourself a music artist? what?
I'm an artist who makes music sometimes to throw you off the scent of my butthole. the more confused you are about who I am, the easier it is for me to stay ahead of you.

VIDEOS

you used to have photo galleries from home videos. were they from the videos you have on your site now?
no. the videos I have on my site now are just a small fraction. the rest is being used for a huge crazy ass DVD I've had in the works for a couple years. I only took the pics down cause it was there were just too many. plus you'll get to see the actual videos of it later anyway.

what kind of things do you do when you go to record a video?
absolutely nothing. we just grab a camera, some wigs, and start crapping out whatever comes to mind. we always wonder what it'd be like if we actually wrote a skit instead of just making it up as we went along. we could probably do some big things, but, none of us feel the need to do that yet. it just wouldn't be as fun. but basically we just take a visual shit on the camera lens and see how crazy it looks afterwards.

when is Go-Ped Gangsters 4 coming out?
we don't know! we were planning big things for it though, through actual go-ped manufacturers and brands. so please, either send us lots of money or be patient! lol

you've stared in a short film with director Tommy Duncan III. what's it about?
it's a black & white Noire that takes place in old Baltimore. it's about a young detective's investigation that's gone bad, with psychological elements. its called Die Laughing. it's out now.

why do you and your friends ride smaller dirt bikes?
they're 70s. I used to ride a 230 dual sport, but it was nowhere near as fun as these little ass-rockets! if you knew that, you'd already have 1. they're small enough to transport as many as 4 at a time with even the smallest truck, but still powerful enough to haul your fat ass through the woods faster than a coked-up butt-bandit.

in the video for your "667" song, did you just film car accidents? what did it all mean?
it's meant to be a riddle. and no. everything in that video was there for a reason.

PHOTOS

do you & Jen set Dexter (our bearded dragon) in those poses?
no. what we take photos of is just him at random times wandering around the house, following ppl, or bullying the other animals.

can I have a few photos from your galleries at their full original size?
[unanswered]